Season 10 Stars Line Up

Well ladies and gents---I'm back and better than ever! Finally--- a season worth watching! I'm not saying I'm thrilled about all our stars (more on that in a minute) but hey---there is a definitely some interest that's been perked in me.

I know many of you already have this information if you endured the freaking 3 hour spectacle of the Bachelor Finale last night---but what you don't have is my thoughts on the cast. I hope it's worth your time.

So without further delay---it's time to list all our "stars".

Let's begin with the fact that we still don't have a definite answer on Tom's new co-host. Notice, last night Melissa (move on already) Rycroft was announced as his special guest. Oh just make a decision already. It's not like whoever gets picked has some MAJOR shoes to fill. PAH-LESE! Do we all remember Samantha's mind-blowing interviews? You don't??? EXACTLY! So---as far as I'm concerned I can't be certain Melissa is it. I hope ABC makes a decision soon---all this flip flopping and agonizing is a little to Bacheloresc for me---and don't get me started on that. IN FACT, I have so much to say about that pansy Pavelka that I will save him for last.

1. Chad Ochocinco--don't know him...don't care---But I guess we'll include him in the line up since he is paired to 2 time champ Cheryl Burke and he is the staple football player we all expect to see. How about a basketball player or hockey?---CHANGE IT UP ALREADY!

2. Aiden Turner--some Hottie McNaughty from All My Children. Good ole' Edyta is paired with him. It must be in her contract to get the hot guy. She pretty much gets the best looking stars---well---for the most part,

3. Erin "I was peeped at" Andrews--Big whoop-For someone soooooo violated you sure don't mind getting up in front of America and wearing next to nothing...that's a smart move. Don't misunderstand me folks---I do believe she was a victim and that sicko needs some major help but I'm sure she's not the only woman peeped on. Come on now...you're in the public eye and you're good looking---how dare you change in your private hotel room!? It is important that I back this gal because she is paired with my Maks. So for that reason and that reason alone I like you. I'm also celebrating beyond words at the fact that Kate is not with Maks as I first predicted---or with Pam "Dirty Hep Queen" Anderson.

4. Buzz Aldrin--That fool isn't dead??? HUH? I mean seriously, wasn't he like 60 when he walked on the moon 4 decades ago? (if that even happened---ha ha ha) and how sad for him to be known as second person to walk on the moon---couldn't good ole' Neil say..."On the count of three we jump out!"--Stinking KILL JOY! But anyway---he's old and fragile and he'll be dancing with Ashley Costa (is this the former Ashley Delagrosa??---I think so. It will be nice to have her and her caterpillar eyebrows back)

5. Niecy Nash--She's the chick from Reno 911. I think she's on some other gig too---some clean house show. She's paired with Louie Van Amstel.

6. Shannen Doherty--Oh yeah...BRENDA WALSH baby---90210's resident bad girl. Love it! A little fact about her is she was married to Ashley Hamilton for like a hot second. For those of you that don't remember Ashley---let me assure you he IS a man and he was on DWTS for the same hot second last season? the season before that? Oh who cares...he was the first one booted out whatever season he was on. I guess it's trendy to have 90210 alums on the show---so ABC when do we all get to yell "Donna Martin GRADUATES!!!!"??? Is she signed on for next season? Brenda is paired with Mark Ballas. She'll eat him alive. And speaking of eating...what's up with her teeth? Some thing is off...way off.

7. Evan Lysacek--You all know him....he won the Gold in figure skating. It was figure skating right? I mean the only thing I recall about the Vancouver Olympics was the Shamu Attack---Oh wait...that wasn't even an event! Yeah...so I admit it...I didn't watch. Evan will be dancing with Anna Trebunskaya.

8. Nicoloe Scherzinger--She's the lead singer for the group Pussycat Dolls. So she basically, looks good and can't sing. I'm a little irritated because HELLO ABC---she's a dancer!!! Come on...what is she doing on there? She can't possibly last long cause who really cares about the Pussycat Dolls except adolescent boys? and I'm pretty certain those boys are not watching DWTS. She's partnered with Mr. Annoying himself...Derek Hough!

9. Pamela Anderson--I don't even have to say much about her...we all the know basic facts: she's got big boobs, she flip flops between Tommy Lee and Kid Rock, she's a PETA fanatic, has 2 boys, and Hepatitis. Oh yeah...and she was on Baywatch and in Playboy. She's partnered with a new dancer Damian Whitewood. Whoa what a gig---your first season on DWTS and you get Pam DAMN Anderson??? What a resume booster!

10. Kate Gosselin--(imagine the most disgusted look on my face as you read this)---she'll be annoying us in just a matter of weeks. Ugh...I literally just upchucked. I know...I know...having her on the show is good TV---I get it....but do you know what would have been GREAT TV?? Having her ex Jon on there!! Too bad ABC---you should have thought of that! The two exes competing...HOW AWESOME! But wait...who would watch the kids? Oh that's right...the 7 billion nannies they have. I will admit that I'd rather have her earn a living by dancing on a hit show...than have her put a picture book together of her kids with a little captions that say, "Hannah---my little Angel---may you always follow your dreams" and have it wind up on the BEST SELLER list. Oh please! Just in case you don't know how I feel about her...I would love ---LOVE--for her to be the first contestant booted off. That would be so amazing. Go home and raise your kids! They've been exploited enough! She's paired with Tony Dovolani. Poor guy.

11. Jake "On the Wings of PUKE" Pavelka--Okay, first off---I'm embarrassed to admit that I watched the Bachelor---but in watching said show I now have a perfect opinion of him. He's a moron! He's boring. He's ridiculous. He's a crybaby. He has horrible judgement. HE'S A CLASS A JERK. I am so sick of him boring me to death that I just can't imagine a new show with him on it. I mean really---do we need to see more of this wavering "I love you...no I love you...no wait...I love you both...but I still love Ali, too, and I love my mom and I love Gia" horn dog? NO--we do not! I'm very very worried about sweet young-- Chelsea Hightower (my favorite gal dancer). She is the one paired with him. Watch out Chelsea---whatever you do...don't ever say, "I love the way you dance" or even give him a smile and tell him he's doing a great job---because I can guarantee you-- he'll be in love with you by the end of the season. Oh and wait...Aren't you a freaking pilot? How many vacation days does an airline pilot get? Do you even have a job? Rumor on the street is he's a limo driver and not a pilot. I guess the head gear for a driver and a pilot look sorta similar and I suppose you can call driving a humongous car around "flying" but really??? What's the deal? America... If he hasn't annoyed you yet...just you wait---you'll be in tears and he'll be in tears in a few minutes.

A few things I'd like to point out is ---ABC is listening to me. First, they select Kate Gosselin, then they get rid of Samantha, and did you all catch what else they did??? They cut the couples list down from like 17 to 11!!! woo hoo! Now that's more like it! What else would you like to see change. I apparently have some pull in that area. My next mission is getting the back up singer fired! One mission at a time folks. ONE-MISSION-AT-A-TIME!

Another interesting tidbit...you'll notice quite a few of our resident dancers are gone, too.
Karina...FINALLY!
Lacey...It's about time!
Jonathan...there isn't a sickly on this season so naturally he was left out.
Dmitry...when he ruined it for Maya---I knew his DAYS were numbered!

So my dear sweet readers---Welcome back. This season will be spectacular. I just know it!

Back and ready for action,
Len-da Isa-ba

Rumors...Rumors...but soon we'll know the truth!

Okay so apparently many of you know that DWTS season 10 cast list will be announced today! I have yet to see any announcements.

I did however hear a lot of buzz and possibilities of who's on and what's going to change but for now...none of it can be written in stone.

Here's what I hear is going down...

First off...my prediction is most likely coming a reality....More like NIGHTMARE! Kate freaking Gosselin is on the show. I'll just say it right now...I know Maks will be paired up with her. I just know it. AND since I'm already expecting it I would like to put out a special message for my Maksy to read.

BE THE BIGGEST ASS YOU CAN BE! okay? Seriously...be mean...be harsh...BE THE MAKS we know and love! If you need assistance in how to be condescending and horrible take a little looksy at some of the fine episodes of Jon and Kate plus Eight---you've got much to learn from the master!

Other buzz and rumors are that we might have a little Full House reunion with Candace Cameron-Bure and John Stamos both appearing this season. I really like them both so if it's true...I hope you two can dance! However, the million dollar question is...if they both are on the show--who would Bob Saggot vote for??? His precious DJ or Uncle Jesse--Oh the problems---Oh the dilemma...

I hear that Pam-Jugs-Anderson is on as well as Kevin Federline---aka Brittney's Ex who's now a porker.--wait wasn't he on some celebrity (ha) fit show? Maybe he's not a porker...we'll see.

We already know Samantha's gone...but who will be her replacement??? The rumor mill says...
the contenders are:
Brooke Burke---nah...she'd annoy me.
Kelly Osborne---Oh please....
Melissa Rycroft---Seriously...move on already---your 15 minutes are UP!
and Vanessa Minillo---I guess she'd be good. She's Nick Lachey's girlfriend and former Miss Teen USA. She hosted a show called True Beauty and although I like her...I can't say I'll like her for DWTS.

And finally the best rumor (in my opinion)---Karrrina, Slutina...looks like a Bull in heat Smirnoff has been CUT from the pros list. Oh nice would that be? Actually, I'd take another season of Karina if we can get rid of that ridiculous back up singer with forehead flare!

Stay tuned tonight as they reveal the cast in a very long and drawn out ABC fashion during the 7 hour Bachelor Finale---all the rumors will finally be put to REST!

DWTS starts Monday, March 22nd.--Stay tuned!

Len-da

Much buzz about Samanth's WAYYYYY overdue departure!

Hello all you DWTS fans out there..I know many of you have sent me articles and news clips sharing the wonderful --yet very overdue departure of SaMANtha. Of course, I'm thrilled. It was time. IT WAS TIME 9 seasons ago!

This bit of news-- might be just what I needed to get back into the show. HOWEVER, I feel I must say that I really hope ABC thinks long and hard about who Samantha's replacement should be. This decision is critical! Word on the street (thank you Lisa) is that Melissa Rycroft might be her replacement...OH COME ON! Please...please...find someone else---and not Kate Gosselin! Hmmm...who would I want to see replace Samantha (besides me of course). I think I would like to see Jennie Garth or perhaps bring back DREW!!! What are your thoughts?

Anyway...that all remains to be seen!

So yes...I'm a happy camper...but the only way to make me jump off the moon ECSTATIC is to get rid of the back up singer with her annoying forehead flare (great phrase Suzy!)

Next season of DWTS begins...March 22nd!

So I called it....

Next season we get to see that greedy Gosselin on DWTS...

(Cue barf fest!)

Stay tuned...it's sure to be interesting!!!!

Okay so apparently the hiatus lasted all season...

so...SUE ME!!!!

I mean really...I don't get paid for this stuff! And when push comes to shove and I have to let something go to get other stuff done...well...guess what suffers?? Yep...DWTS.

BUT...I did want to say that the bad winning prediction streak is OVER!!!

If you'll notice on the side of the blog---I predicted Donny would win.

Of course, I need to say something about this.

First off, I did watch the final dances including the freestyles (what I basically wait all season for) and based on that alone---Donny deserved it.

Kelly---FELL??? Really...that's just sad. I knew, you knew and she knew...it was over then and there!

Mya---GOT ROBBED. She was a terrific dancer but that freestyle...oh brother SNOOZEFEST! Dmitry should have listened to her. Hairspray??? Been there...done that!

Donny---well...it was entertaining and it screamed DONNY OSMOND!

A few thoughts...I can't promise that I'll be back next season....I really can't. They really need to change up the show BIG TIME for me to stay interested. I've said this before and I'll say it again. They need to do an all stars cast with all the fan favorites. That would really get people excited. They also need to cut down the contestant list from 103 to 10. Seriously, by the time the seasons over I can't even remember who the first 6 couples were anyway.

Just some suggestions for the producers out there!

Finally, I just can't wait for my prediction to come true...MARK MY WORDS....Kate Gosselin will appear on this show. The day that happens is the day I tune in...and PUKE of course! And if she's even a tad bit good at dancing ...she'll get the pity votes and win!---AND...since we're going down this path...she'll probably be paired up with my Maksy!---just to make sure that dagger is in deep.

But friends...for those that faithfully watched all season...you all deserve a medal cause..I---Len-da Isa-ba---one of the biggest fans out there couldn't muster up the strength to watch it---which we all know says a lot.

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving....celebrating not turkey time but all the wonderful things the Lord has blessed us with. We have so much to be thankful for!

And of course a very MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Len-da is on HIATUS baby!`

Well dear friends and loyal readers---as you have probably noticed..Len-da Isa-ba is on a reviewing hiatus at the moment. I'm not saying, I've given up on the show and that I won't watch again this season or next or the one after that. It's just that at this very moment...I'm not available to keep up with this rigorous reviewing schedule.

So I challenge my loyal friends, readers, and fellow critics...to get creative and review the show for me. Similar to the shenanigans on the show of getting guest judges, we'll have guest reviewers.

If interested please, email me and let me know what week you'd like to review and my contribution to the assignment will be to give you an appropriate reviewer alias. There can only be one Len-da Isa-ba...but I think I can get pretty creative when I need to.

Also, I can post your email content right on to the website and send it out like I always do. So you'll be very official. Please include a photo of yourself if possible. (What a fun assignment this will be!)

I promise to return and resume my responsibilities in a little while---that is if I'm still needed and wanted by the end.

Hope you'll take on the challenge.

On temporary hiatus---
Len-da Isa-ba

Week 4 and 4 new dances...

Let's see if I can make it through the entire 5 hour show without my eye candy.

I see they are now making an attempt to add new dances to change up the show. I believe they have tried this before and it didn't prove to be fair well. Let's see how it goes this time around. Apparently, the shows ratings have dropped MAJORLY! It hasn't been this low since 2005 or 2006. I'm not surprised. The producers are thinking they might need to cut it down to having the show once a year rather than 2. My idea is cut down the contestants to 8or 10 couples...make hte show 1 hour long and eliminate results night completely. That would perk up the audience.

I would like to take a moment and predict IN WRITING that I have a sneaky feeling that one way the show will boost ratings is by asking Kate Gosselin to join the cast. They are waiting for the divorce drama to end and then mark my words...they'll catch that big fish... hook, line and sinker! She's greedy and loves to be in the spotlight...so what a perfect fit! Just wanted to put that out there! And I'm sure they'll pair her up with my Maksy and that will be the final nail in my coffin. URGHGHAGH

Anyway...moving on...


Chuck and Anna-Entertaining, but the guy really needs to go. He's not very good. I think he's fun to watch but I'm slowly getting over it. The one thing that I am sick to death of is his HAIR---or lack of hair. I just can't stomach it. What self-respecting man has a Mohawk?
Oh brother...how painful was it to listen to Chuck explain to SaMANtha about the lasso...spit it out buddy.


Melissa and Mark-I was already annoyed at their pre-dance squat-fest....but they won me over. That dance was awesome. I loved the black and white effect at the beginning and then the music and steps...great job! The one thing that I'm gonna say about Mark and yes this is going to be mean...so brace yourself. Was he wearing those funny groucho glasses and nose? Sure looked like it to me. Yikes Mark...YIKES.

Natalie and Alec- EXCELLENT. I really like her. She has yet to annoy me. That is a very good sign. She had excellent balance and some fancy split tricks... She also has become a lot more comfortable with being so close to Alec. I think the judges are ridiculous. Okay...you want Natalie to be more romantic and close than she already was...geez louise--THE MAN IS MARRIED. As for what Bruno blubbered...I can't say I even bothered to listen.

Aaron and Karrrina--I can barely stand to look at that little baby and his hussy. Can you even believe that there is talks that he and Karina are an item. Oh brother. Wow...her standards have sure taken a NOSE dive! That scene with Aaron crying and needing his brother from another mother to comfort him---I couldn't help but shake my head in disapproval. He bugs. She bugs. AND of course they would get the Lambada of all dances. Those producers sure are smart. They know what sells and based on the press..this might be it. I thought the dance was awful. AWFUL. I'm not sure how gymnastics fit into it at all, there was a lot of aggressive dancing that didn't flow., and a lot of unnecessary repetition. My favorite part was when they totally RUINED the ending. PERFECT. Just perfect. Oh boy... those judges comments are gonna make him cry. You can totally see the lip quivering. I'm sorry...did any of you listen to Karina's explanation for the backflip? Hysterical. NO sense...none. "We thought that when you go to the beech and you are having fun and the flip and the water and the heat...WHAT??? And I loved how Aaron was telling all of us that he won't cry this time around....you sure about that buddy?

Lacey and Mark-It's always a nice touch to include some family visits. I think I expected him to do much worse. He was actually pretty good. That song..and those singers...oh boy...that was awful. They really messed that one up! I am a little sick of all the contestants running out in the audience and stealing kisses...just wait until after the show okay?

Louie & Kelly-She auditioned for Chicago...got the lead...and then they took it away cause she couldn't dance...sure she did. She probably made the call backs and then when they realized she can't dance they cut her from the audition pool. Got the lead....yeah right. And those nails...geez...as you all know I love love love nail polish...but that's a bit much even for me. The dance was good but they went a little overboard.---THEY ALL went overboard. I think Melissa's was better. WAIT A COTTON PICKEN MINUTE...did you all hear that SaMANtha apparently played Roxy in Chicago...oh gag me! Maybe her understudy...

Joanna and Derek...(cue barf fest---NOW!) I also am not an animal person so that whole pet adoption idea didn't do a thing for me. Again...producers why do you have to make Derek and Joanna do the Lambada, too. It's not enough that Karrrina (her twin) had to dance it, too. How do they decide who dances what? Oh dear...Derek put your shirt back on. No one wants to see a prepubescent boy half naked up there...NO ONE! I hate that they love her. I hate that they are all making such a big deal about them. But Tom B. was hysterical when he said he thinks that the parents are probably in bed, too. ha ha As far as Derek thinking he can compete in the big leagues and take off his shirt with the best of them...i.e. MAKS...not quite! Keep trying!

Donny and Kym-The throwing himself on the ground during rehearsal...I'm sure your kids will love seeing their daddy throw a temper tantrum. Newsflash...kids pick up on things we say and do right??? You're in for a real treat! As for their dance...very entertaining. I think I really like the Charleston. Those dances were the most fun to watch.

Michael and Anna---I forwarded right through it... sorry...not a fan favorite. Anna is soooo boring they need to bring in Tony to spice things up a bit. There time is limited...very limited.

Chelsie and Louie-I miss Ty. That whole piece was so cute. the mini-me comment...the "I need a booster" to get on the horse...too too funny. What I love about Louie is that when the judges knock him and tear him to shreds---he gets this smirk on his face as if his grandpa said something totally old-fashioned. I love it. He's such a good sport...no crying for this guy.

Mya and Dmitry--they are good. No doubt about it.

And finally the show ends and I can catch some shut eye.

Keep Dancing,

Len-da Isa-ba